Episode 2 - Svetlana
In this second episode, we meet Svetlana, an Ukrainian psychologist fleeing from the war and assisting Ukrainian mothers and children staying in Lomianki.
The mental health aspect is a very important and extremely sensitive issue, especially when approaching trauma related to such powerful events, such as a war.
A fundamental part of the project, the psychosocial aspect has also met with reticence and resistance from the refugees, but we have always tried to respect the will and timing of the people who, at different times, have felt comfortable sharing their emotions, both through group and individual sessions.
What are your earliest memories related to your arrival in Poland?
The first feelings after arriving in Poland in June 2022 with my daughters were of total confusion, misunderstanding of my future and great pain because of everything that I left at home. It was difficult to look at the sky where planes and helicopters were flying, because the sky in Ukraine looked empty and quiet from the first day of the war. It was also hard to look at people living ordinary lives: walking, laughing, arguing, reconciling. It seemed that all this had lost its meaning. I simply had to survive.
What were the biggest difficulties and how were they overcome (or not)?
I took from home all the savings that my husband and I had. It was supposed to last for a while (about 6 months), but I understood that the war would be much longer and I did not have enough money. It was necessary to look for a job and school for my oldest daughter, who was finishing 3rd grade. It was our first days in Poland, and the owner of the house we were staying in took me to the school and asked if there was a room. My daughter was received with great love and an open heart, for which I will forever be grateful to the teacher of her class, who organized a warm reception for her. That evening, my daughter happily showed us all the greeting cards drawn by Polish children, which we still keep.
The second problem was finding a job. I didn't know the language, so I didn't even know where to start. Added to this was the issue of my younger daughter, for whom I also had to find a job somewhere. But a coincidence helped me in this situation (in my opinion, God Himself led me all the time and until now). The owner of the apartment told me that in the kindergarten of the Immaculate Sisters they were accepting children from Ukraine. I was glad, because then I could have time to look for a job. There they accepted my daughter and it turned out that I could be employed as a psychologist to a group of Ukrainian children. Fortunately, the Polish government allowed psychologists with a degree issued in Ukraine to work in the country. Since then, I have changed several jobs, which were related to projects for Ukrainians, nostrified my diploma (which means it corresponds to a Polish diploma), learned the language and received a B1 state certificate. Currently, I also work as a psychologist in one of the Polish foundations, which deals with projects for foster families and people from Ukraine. I conduct corrective-developmental classes in the sensory integration room, working with Polish children from foster families and Ukrainian children aged 2 to 18 and their parents. I have the opportunity to participate in various trainings and conferences. I have completed the Shantal Method Massage Instructor Course, the Sensory Integration Level I Course and I won't stop there.
Another problem was finding an apartment, because the landlord only allowed us to stay with him until the end of the summer, and then we had to look for another house. When I saw the rental prices, I realized that I couldn't afford housing, food and school on my own. At one point I was even going to move back home, but my husband refused to let me, because things at home were no longer safe; he was also risking losing his job and getting enlisted in the Ukrainian forces. Therefore, when I heard about the house of the Order of St. Camillus, where Ukrainians live, where a girl from work was already living at the time, I asked her for a room there. They accepted us, and this gave me hope for the future.
The smallest, but also a problem, was to make all the necessary documents, but all the time I was helped by good people, and once I knew the language a little, I learned to solve most things on my own, and now it is not a problem for me.
How have the Polish people's approach changed over the months compared to your first arrival in Poland?
For the first months of my stay in Poland, I felt great support and understanding from the locals. But as time went by, it became apparent that the situation was changing, there were more people who didn't care, and a year later, you could already face open hostility. As a psychologist, I understood that these are natural processes, but it hurts no less. Coping with this pain is helped by the fact that I have met a huge number of truly kind and sincere people on my path, who have welcomed me and my children with an open heart and supported me at home and at work. I have colleagues among the Polish people and they are my support.
What are your feelings about your current situation in Poland?
Now my situation is as follows: the children go to school, they have good grades, I work, and it looks like I will be able to find a job with my specialty in Poland even if there is no funding from the Foundation. Thanks to the project, I have secured housing until the end of 2025 and have the ability to save for the future. My husband has enlisted himself in the military and I can't count on him, so now I'm relying only on myself.
Aside from the financial income, how does your work help you as a person?
The management of the foundation where I work is very positive towards me, I don't feel that I came from another country. We simply work together for one purpose. I have the opportunity to realize my potential, I love working with people, helping and supporting others is a source of inspiration and strength for me. Sometimes it is difficult and tiring, but all it takes is one smile from a grateful mother, or a change for the better in at least one child in my charge, and I have the strength to go on and live life to the fullest.
Can you tell us an episode or story that particularly touched you?
There were really a lot of stories. For me, it's not a story, but a person, a mother with two children with autism. The boy is 7 years old and has a severe form of autism with mental disorders and her 8-year-old daughter with a mild form of autism, but it's not easy with her either. She doesn't have a husband and is here with her mother and children. They attend my classes. She doesn't have the opportunity to go to work, but she has gone to study at a policy school, is learning Polish, and is always kind and polite. When I look at this, I understand that I don't have any problems, that I can handle everything in the world, that one should enjoy life and not forget to help those who need it.
How do you look at your future and what is the feeling with respect to the end of the war?
I look to the future with hope. I no longer focus on the end of the war. I would love it all to be over so that my husband could come to us. We could work together and raise our children. That's rather dreamy. But I focus on today and live according to Theodore Roosevelt's principle “Do the best you can with what you have, where you are.”
You can find the previous episode HERE.
